I’m right back where I started; totally lost on what to do with my life, and more specifically, my education.

I mean, I know what I want to do, I just have no idea how to get there.  I’m working on finishing my degree in family science, then hoping to move on to graduate studies in textiles, clothing, and design (merchandising, of course)  That’s my plan because that’s what my advisor thought would be best.  But the problem is, I don’t even know if I can get in to the master’s program.  And A.E. has already presented some job opportunities.  What do I do, turn down A.E. if they actually offer, or try to do both?  Do I scrap my plans on a masters in fashion merchandising?  Why does society do this to me?  All these expectations, to have plans and stick to them and have “dreams”.  I have “dreams” but no one can give me a concrete plan for how to attain them.  Its all about the “if’s”, “if” I can get into the masters program, and “if” I can manage to finance a masters degree, and “if”  I can even keep my head above water while trying to attain it.  Shit! 

Here’s what I want.  I want to obtain training and go to work designing visuals for clothing stores.  My family science education isn’t helping me much there, but my experience at A.E. (supported by loads of hands-on training and encouragement by the management teams that I work for) is setting me on the right track.  But I need that education to qualify me.  Blast!  That’s what has been on my mind this week.

In other news:

The pinched nerve in my back has caused my upper back, shoulders, and left arm to go almost completely numb.  Its pretty cool though, and the doctor swears its nothing to be immediately concerned about.  In the mean time no heavy lifting.  (why did I purchase that snap fitness membership?!)

I survived “black Friday” with NO grouchy customers.  The days following have been smattered with a couple of grinches, to whom I say “Stay home!”  But I’m loving the moms who come in and ask for my help selecting the perfect outfit for their daughter or son.  

I have an ENTIRE weekend off! Mom is coming to Christmas shop, and help decorate the apartment.  In high school I would have never imagined being excited to spend a weekend with my mom, but I am totally stoked!

Dead week starts officially on Monday, but I only have on little project to present, and then comes finals week.  Wish me luck!

Baby bro is finally applying to colleges and talking to coaches and making visits.  He’s pretty sure he’s going to Weslyan though, which means he will be in Lincoln, which I am totally excited about.  Please pray that he finds the right place for him though.

Steve is coming home!!  I’ve missed him a TON!

Love,

Me

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